In 2006 I bought a software called Notebook and began keeping a journal. I wrote regularly in 2006 and pretty much regularly in 2007. (This year's notebook, 2008, has all of seven entries, including the one I wrote today.)
And by the way, it was interesting to do a search to find how many times I mentioned being achy. Very interesting.
Also interesting to find how much my energy level and motivation have decreased over the last two years. I hope it's the fibromyalgia and not my age. There's hope for the fibromyalgia, but not much I can do about getting older!
Anyway, I ran across a little something I wrote on July 10 of 2006 that I'd like to share here:
I have been thinking hard about life, and God, and dreams, and surrender, and joy in work, and making your dreams come true. Wondering how it all fits together. There appears to be a strong human spirit in all of us that makes us more powerful than we know. And we have it whether we know God or not. So then, what do we need God for? I suppose for answering our sin question. No one can deal with sin.
But now I'm having crazy thoughts, like "what is sin exactly?" I know the traditional definitions, but I'm starting to get a slightly different picture of sin. There is an element of choice and defiance. But we are not just perpetrators of sin, we are victims of sin --Sin is something we need to be saved from.
I'm also wondering if sin encompasses all the wounds and imperfections and inadequacies we suffer from, as well as the purposeful wrong actions. That doesn't necessarily mean we are to be blamed for our imperfections. I think we are victims, so to speak, of a sinful world where we are no longer perfect, and Jesus came to rescue us from that. And in his great mercy he also brought forgiveness for our rebellion and defiance.
What do you think?